Why some TV shows make it

For illustration purposes.

Why is Barney Stinson so popular? Why do people religiously follow the romantic conquests of Ted Mosby and bask in the bliss that surrounds Marshall and Lily, week after week when every sane person knows that the eponymous Mother will never be revealed in the foreseeable future? Just like how people lost interest when they broke out in Prison Break, or when the plot started to feel strained when villains took centrestage in Heroes, viewership for HIMYM should have been lost long ago, since nothing in the show has any real impact on how the asshole Ted meets the kids' mom. Also noteworthy is how Ted's kids never say anything and always fidget in the same way in their cutscenes. Don't be surprised when at the end of it all 50 year old Ted Mosby comes out and says "FOOLED YA NEVER GOT MARRIED!" before proceeding to disconnect the two robots sitting on that couch. In fact, I'm pretty sure they are robots, they sat there for about 6 years already without having the need to take a shit.

Back to the main discussion. These ardent followers of the series, often go as far as to incorporate lingo picked up from the episodes into everyday conversation. Exhibit A. "Did you see that? That was LEGEND-wait for it-". No fuck you, it wasn't legendary. Neither was it awesome, statistically speaking.

Brings me to my main thesis. People watch HIMYM because it projects an ethereal image of what they wish their friendships and relationships were. Who are you trying to kid? Your conversations aren't as quick-witted and humorous. Even if they were, they probably happened online, or worse, with yourself. Also, your friends and yourself aren't nearly as hot as the actors with impeccable complexion and boob to ass ratios. Not that it is a problem. Just that it is one of the reasons why people watch the show. I know it is for me.

In essence, shows such as this are the Disney of television. It is an escapist's dream, promising 22 minutes of quick relief  from the terrible drone that is your sad life. However, Disney does have a channel on television that screens re-runs of Mr Bean, to the best of my knowledge. That snippet of information has no relevance whatsoever.

With that, I conclude my critical analysis of plaguing social trends that threaten to corrupt our cores. Join us next week as our special agents continue to answer life's bigger questions. The monikers 'wayne' and 'RJ' brought up in the preceding post are in fact code names and bear no resemblance to anybody who ever lived.

hello this is soley!

(hello good morning how'd you do? what makes your rising sun so new? i could use a fresh beginning too, all of something something new.)

today at work, i realised most people dont understand that temp staff do not know anything at all about how the whole machine functions, and when you ask me for help i will just take a minute to act like im doing something knowledgable while you're watching and then take a long drawn out melodramatic sigh to show you that ive-tried-yet-resigned-myself-to-the-sad-fate-that-this-problem-is-WAYYYY-too-complicated, and must hence ask the higher up boss lady to come fix it. which she does, by plugging in the plug into the plughole. embarassing moment right there.

also, it is quite sad that people at work call me boy-boy / ah-boy. like wtf dude im an adult now! and i pretty much tower over you how the hell am i an ah boy. makes me feel like a 5 year old again. not that i wouldnt mind being 5 again, avoid the whole nonsensical adult life nonsense thing that i have to undergo.

5 is a good number, i always liked it when doing math, cause very easy to manipulate. like 5x8=40! like i did that really fast, i got the answer before i wrote it. im smart.


RJ says (10:01 PM):
penis
wayne says (10:01 PM):
PENIUS
genius penis

My Hero

All too often this simple weblog has kept consistent with its aim of dissolving and trying to answer Man's greater mysteries. That being said, it is forgiveable for the author to discuss some of the topics that strike closer to home. This can not be necessarily construed as narcissism, unlike the narcoleptic who deals narcotics under the narcissus plant.

I would continue to refer to myself in third-person as 'the author', but my lack of commitment hinders its success. Just take it as my attempt to level with the audience and not appear pretentious. But now, you are trapped in a conundrum. How do you know I am not pretending to be unpretentious? You don't.

As mentioned, I will talk about something that strikes close to home. I live near the airport and the plane I was on struck the tarmac upon landing, so I deem it appropriate for me to discuss the concept of flying.

Humans aren't meant to fly. The ear popping sensations are actually slaps from a higher being telling us that we have breached the boundaries of the human playing area and crashed into the angels' casino. See there? I circumvented offending any existing religions by creating a quasi-religion where angels are allowed to gamble. I also achieve this by making references to religious figures as vaguely as possible. For example if I say I'm going to draw the prophet, tensions will rise only up till the point where they look at my drawing and realise that I drew the Spartan prophets on the mountains from 300.

Turbulence sucks too. Not to be confused with turbans, although turbans do cause turbulence in some cases. This phenomena is best exemplified by the following historical video from India.

Without going into further details, my hero is Superman.

Peace out, assholes.

The case for prom

My prom date

In the midst of post exam activities, I can't help but find the whole prom hoo-ha the most frivolous of activities for anyone of this frivolous age to partake in. And that speaks volume, because my post exam activities are as facetious as frivolity gets. Sometimes nothing goes on my mind for hours. For example, I left off the last sentence five hours ago and now it's 1 AM.

In our mindless pursuits to capture moments in time of our Sunday bests on a Monday with equally or more attractive members of the opposite sex, we often fail to recognise the equally or more subtractive effects on our wallets. As enticing as the stimulation of the economy sounds, I don't give a shit because there is little trickle-down effect. Always the rich people trickling the poor's money and the poor getting trickled. And call me a cheapskate if you want, because we live in a democratic country and that comment does not constitute slander. But my feelings will be hurt, and I will probably talk to you less in future. More importantly, screw you; it's not your money you're spending.

Then I have to justify the spending and the formality to my mother. So I tell her it's for prom. Then she asks me why am I dressing up for a simple fare of seafood. So I said ma, prom not prawn; it's short for promenade. Then she asks me why am I wearing a suit for a fruit. So I said no ma that's a pomegranate.

Okay i ran out of juice.

Nah, not really.

WTF? THIS POST SUCKS!

Mindblown

From here:

The way your family trees severely collapses when you look back a reasonable (<50) number of generations. I hope this explanation is clear:

You have two parents, four grandparents, eight great-grandparents, and so on. In general, if you look n generations back, there are 2^(n+2) people who are your (n-great)-grandparents.

Let's generously say a generation is 30 years. If you look back 40 generations, to around the year 800 C.E., you have 2^42 (40-great)-grandparents. That's well over four trillion people, more people than were alive in 800 C.E. by several orders of magnitude. More people than have ever been alive.

The reason this is possible: If you looked at a list of your 2^42 40-great-grandparents, you'd see duplicates. In fact, each name would show up around 10,000 times, possibly even more. So your (mom's mom's dad's mom's ... dad) is the same as your (dad's mom's dad's dad's ... dad), and in fact your can trace your ancestry to that guy in about 10,000 different ways.

 I have nothing funny to add. Sorry.

I know I should be studying,

But lately I have been occupied by very random thoughts.

Eating seedless fruits one day, I found the whole process of evolution counterintuitive. Darwin would probably flip in his grave. You see, the whole point of having seeds in the first place is for the fruit to ensure its long term viability as a species, so technically, a fruit full of seed is a fruitful plant. However it seems as though the only purpose for the existence of fruits nowadays is to appease human gluttony, and our lazy asses have made us spiteful of the presence of seeds. So we breed the seedless varieties. Seedless oranges, seedless grapes, and props to anyone who successfully creates the seedless durian. So seedlessness is now a virtue, not a bane to a species' continued survival. Which on another note, is absolutely confounding as to how they even reproduce now. I tried burying a seedless grape three months ago but the plot is still bare.

I guess my point is, evolution is ultimately influenced by irrational human wants, but even then this still does not explain why fat people are still around.

Exam stress

It's been awhile since I've tried putting my thoughts into words.

Aasihdoiadiha  dsfhashodihfowe gjoijdfogqwnqnsas doizisdnanw dabnlshiofge asdnlncsaa.